The Insidious Need to Be Right
by Jackie Lapin
Growing up in my house(Jackie Lapin's) was filled with love. However it was not peaceful home. The reason was:
Both of my parents always wanted to be right and to have the last word. They argued
incessantly. But it was usually over trivial things ... what night was it they went to the movies, how was the best way to feed the dog, what to spend money on, where to go for dinner. ..etc. It was constant bickering. They defended it by saying that arguing was essentially opening the pressure valve in their marriage, so that they didn't harbor any lingering ill feelings toward each other.
But the bickering didn't affect just them. I left home as early as I could, and at one point stopped speaking to them for six months, saying my time with them was too short to be spent listening to them argue over virtually everything-and nothing. And sometimes when they were with friends,you could see the discomfort in other people's eyes when my parents got into it.
My point here is that there is always a price for insisting on being right. The insidious need to always be right can destroy relationships, destroy reputations, destroy work environments, destroy lives and destroy the peace of everyone around you.
Certainly, there are times when standing up for what you believe is right is indeed the right thing to do. But there are other times When it isn't.
When:
• It pays diplomatically to let other people be right
• Matters aren't worth arguing about
But the bickering didn't affect just them. I left home as early as I could, and at one point stopped speaking to them for six months, saying my time with them was too short to be spent listening to them argue over virtually everything-and nothing. And sometimes when they were with friends,you could see the discomfort in other people's eyes when my parents got into it.
My point here is that there is always a price for insisting on being right. The insidious need to always be right can destroy relationships, destroy reputations, destroy work environments, destroy lives and destroy the peace of everyone around you.
Certainly, there are times when standing up for what you believe is right is indeed the right thing to do. But there are other times When it isn't.
When:
• It pays diplomatically to let other people be right
• Matters aren't worth arguing about
• You are just insisting on your own way just to fee! powerful and fill your own need to dominate
• The cost of being right outweighs the point of being right
• You are being defensive because you feel attacked (regardless of whether you really are
being attacked or not)• The cost of being right outweighs the point of being right
• You are being defensive because you feel attacked (regardless of whether you really are
• You insist on standing your ground because vou are never wrong!
• You are defending your position because you think you know what is right for other people
• You habitually have to have the last word and will beat people into the ground until they
agree with you
Please check to see if you are guilty of insisting on being right at the cost of your relationship to others. Allow people the rightness of their opinions, and even sometimes when their facts are wrong, you don't have to be the one to set them straight. Mention it once, but don't force it down their throats. And if people are not in full integrity with Universal Laws when they insist on their rightness, allow the Universe to give them a course correction ... it doesn't need to be you.
Use your diplomacy and recognize when there is nothing to be gained by being right.
Let your choices be toward harmony with all, and allow yourself to be a force for equanimity and peace in the world.
Jackie Lapin is the world leader in educating, mentoring and coaching people on Practical
Conscious Creation. She is the bestselling author of ''The Art of Conscious Creation; How
You Can Transform the World" and "Practical Conscious Creation: Daily Techniques to
Manifest Your Desires." Filled with specific and imaginative practices, Practical Conscious
Creation offers 70 articles with step-by-step actions to achieve greater empowerment and
You Can Transform the World" and "Practical Conscious Creation: Daily Techniques to
Manifest Your Desires." Filled with specific and imaginative practices, Practical Conscious
Creation offers 70 articles with step-by-step actions to achieve greater empowerment and
a more satisfying lifestyle. To learn how to become a better , faster manifestor, secure a
free chapter of "Practical Conscious Creation" or receive Jackie Lapin's daily manifesting
tips, visit www.jackielapin.com
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